Christina Applegate Says She Faces ‘Depression’ Due to MS Diagnosis: ‘Trapped in the Dark’

“I won’t let you give up,” Jamie-Lynn Sigler she tells her friend in a new episode of their podcast ‘MeSsy’

Christina Applegate talks about the “real stress” she’s faced since being diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in 2021.

“I’m depressed right now, which I don’t think I’ve felt like in years,” Applegate said in a recent episode of. Messy, a podcast he shares with friend Jamie-Lynn Sigler. “Honestly, f— it’s depression everywhere it kind of scares me a little bit because it feels weird. I’m so caught up in this darkness right now that I haven’t felt like… ‘I don’t even know how long, maybe 20 years,”

The new episode was recorded shortly after Applegate, 52, made a surprise appearance at the Emmy Awards in January, which Applegate called “the hardest day of my life,” saying she slept “for days two” after that.

Related: How Christina Applegate and Jamie-Lynn Sigler ‘Help Each Other Through’ MS: ‘We Both Needed This’ (Exclusive)

Of the toll that MS has taken on her body, Applegate says, “This is to be really honest… I’m not happy to be alive. I’m not having fun. I’m not enjoying things anymore.”

Sigler, who has lived with MS for more than 20 years since being diagnosed, has been playing The Sopranoshe tells Applegate that he understands the confusion.

“It’s very difficult to live with a disabled body. It’s very difficult. I’m not going to take that away from you and I’m right there with you,” he says. “But what makes it difficult is when you compare it to how it was….Once we get you to this place we accept that it will be like this, maybe forever…[coping with MS] it’s not reason enough for you to stop living because I’m sitting here across from you and you’re laughing at me like no one else can. You still make me smile. You make me feel loved.”

Sigler, 43, who shared with PEOPLE in a March cover story how precious her friendship with Applegate is, tells her “I’m not going to let you give up. I can’t. I need you to do it for me.” it.”

Applegate is “incredibly powerful,” Sigler says: “I hope this podcast will show you more of your worth and show you how strong you are and how worthy you are of giving yourself what a chance.”

The It’s dead to me the actress admits that she was reluctant to seek treatment since she found out she had MS while filming the final episode of the show. “I’ve avoided therapy since I was diagnosed because I’m afraid I’ll start crying and I won’t be able to stop,” Applegate says. “I’m just so afraid the floodgates will open and I won’t able to stop.” But, Applegate says, he reconnected with his longtime therapist.

Related: Christina Applegate Says Having MS Has Changed Her As A Parent: ‘It Hurts’ To Say ‘I Can’t’ (Exclusive)

Sigler encouraged her to let herself talk: “I feel like you’re guilty of crying and really, go there…. You just have to, let yourself feel those things. It’s gone, otherwise. you’ll be where you are now, you’re like purgatory, you know?

If you or someone you know needs mental health help, text “MATTA” to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 to be connected to a certified crisis counselor.

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